Women Divided Within the Church

Sitting here on this Saturday evening, I went looking through some old files on my computer and ran across a few articles that I wrote over ten years ago. After reading a few of them, I decided to post this one on Carla's Reflections. I'm still trying to figure out what prompted me to write this article in the first place so long ago -- somebody probably made me mad at church and since I have been known to snap off, more than likely I decided to come home to write an article to let off my frustrations. I do remember though that it was published in a local magazine out of Indiana, I believe. I also believe that it was posted online a few places. This is why I need to be more organized so I can put my hands on the magazine that is was printed in and the document that contains where some of my articles have been posted. Anyway, check it out...

While entering the sanctuary for Sunday service, a rather stunning woman with smooth silky skin confidently walks down the aisle in a stylish designer blue pinstriped pants suit. Before the usher is able to find a bench with an available seat, another woman already seated in a pew is quickly forming her lips, crinkling her nose and rolling her eyes once or twice and spewing the words, “Look at her, she thinks she’s all that. She ain’t nothing.”  

The woman who speaks these negative words doesn’t understand as it says in Proverbs 18:21 (MSG), Words kill, words give life; they’re either poison or fruit—you choose. As women of God, we should make it a priority to stick together and only speak words that uplift rather than tear down. 

Within the body of Christ, it’s unfortunate that some women have this ungodly way of thinking and sadly enough this mindset spreads throughout many churches when it should not. For instance, women who may experience envy due to another wearing a designer outfit whereas they may barely have the funds to shop at Goodwill, let alone Wal-Mart. Married women are uncomfortable being around single women for fear that these women will flirt with their husbands. Then, there are single women who experience jealousy because they don’t have a husband at home or even the prospect of one in near sight.  Educated women looking down on the less educated and the less-educated women calling the educated ones snobs and the list go on. 

The fact remains that as women of God we should celebrate, encourage and uplift each other instead of being judgmental. As my mother drilled in my head while growing up, “If you can’t say anything nice, then don’t say anything at all” and she is so right. I know that I am not perfect and due to maltreatment from others, at one time, I got caught up with this same mentality; I felt I had a reason to act ignorant since other women chose to judge me before even knowing my name.

I have realized the error of my ways and have asked for forgiveness for my actions. Instead of striking back when I get certain looks, I’ve now learned the best thing that I can do is not take these actions seriously because after all it’s important for me to forgive others just as God has forgiven me. When my mind wants to resort to its old way of thinking, I read Matthew 6:14-15 (NIV), as a reminder. If you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins. 

Although no woman is perfect, it is my prayer that speaking positively about one another versus negatively becomes more of the norm. In doing so, I know we are taking the first step into ensuring that we won’t be Women Divided within the Church, which in turn makes the world a better place and helps to build the body of Christ.

©Carla J. Curtis, November 2005